Rum Tum Tugger:
You ought to ask Mr. Mistoffelees!
The original Conjuring Cat
The greatest magicians have something to learn
From Mr. Mistoffelees conjuring turn
And you'll all say
Oh! Well I never was there ever
A cat so clever as magical Mr. Mistoffelees
He is quiet, he is small, he is black
From the ears to the tip of his tail
He can creep through the tiniest crack
He can walk on the narrowest rail
He can pick any card from a pack
He is equally cunning with dice
He is always decieving you into believing
That he's only hunting for mice
He can play any trick with a cork
Or a spoon and a bit of fish paste
If you look for a knife or a fork
And you think it was merely misplaced
You have seen it one moment and then it is gone!
But you find it next week laying out on the lawn
And we all say
Oh! Well I never was there ever
A cat so clever as magical Mr. Mistoffelees
All:
{And we all say
Oh! Well I never was there ever
A cat so clever as magical Mr. Mistoffelees}X3
Mistoffelees/Rum Tum Tugger:
Well! My manner is vague and aloof
You would think there was nobody shyer
But my voice has been heard on the roof
When I was curled up by the fire
And I've sometimes been heard by the fire
When I was about on the roof
At least they all heard that somebody purred
Which is uncontestable proof of my singular magical powers
And I've known the family to call me in from the garden for hours
When I was asleep in the hall
Rum Tum Tugger:
And not long ago this phenomenal cat
Produced seven kittens right out of a hat
And we all say
Oh! Well I never was there ever
A cat so clever as magical Mr. Mistoffelees
Oh! Well I never was there ever
A cat so clever as magical Mr. Mistoffelees
And not long ago this phenomenal cat
Produced seven kittens right out of a hat
And we all say
{Oh! Well I never was there ever
A cat so clever as magical Mr. Mistoffelees}X6
Ladies and gentlemen, I give you the magical Mr. Mistoffelees!